#RIPSTARMAN

Aladdin Sane was my first vinyl album...

I have barely done anything this year, because this year is 11 days old -- and fucking fired. What follows is my thoughts on the death of one of the greatest artists who has ever blessed this place with his existence...

I'm having a hard time today... The music lives on, but all I can do is lay here in silence.

I want to paint & listen to his music, but I'm not ready yet.

David Bowie changed my entire world. Before I knew about him, my world was all kinda pastel colors, but his influence brought the whole range of color into my world. Especially reds.

He gave me high contrast & taught me not to be afraid, but to laugh into the darkness. He protected me. For years I had a poster of him on the back of my door, & it was kind of a YOU SHALL NOT PASS, & no one who meant me any harm ever got passed him.

He gave me the strength to use my anger productively. He helped me learn that my weirdness is a fucking gift, not a tragedy. He said, "Rachel, you can play normal, but don't ever try to be anything but fully YOU."

In the last 50 years, he produced some of the best music, & worked with some of the best musicians & other artists. He was controversial, and drug use may have made him cruel. He was flawed & made some bad decisions... but he was never boring.

My favorite version of him is the last one. The face that showed age & depth, & the eyes that never let us forget he was a tough sonofabitch who took *all* the consequences of his actions & fed them into the next iteration.

He was neither good nor was he evil. He was complete.

And today, the world is broken without him. But we can all weep together in the light from his Super Nova.